The ​Antidote 1 csillagozás

Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking
Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote

Success ​through failure, calm through embracing anxiety—a totally original approach to self-help

Self-help books don’t seem to work. Few of the many advantages of modern life seem capable of lifting our collective mood. Wealth—even if you can get it—doesn’t necessarily lead to happiness. Romance, family life, and work often bring as much stress as joy. We can’t even agree on what “happiness” means. So are we engaged in a futile pursuit? Or are we just going about it the wrong way?
Looking both east and west, in bulletins from the past and from far afield, Oliver Burkeman introduces us to an unusual group of people who share a single, surprising way of thinking about life. Whether experimental psychologists, terrorism experts, Buddhists, hardheaded business consultants, Greek philosophers, or modern-day gurus, they argue that in our personal lives, and in society at large, it’s our constant effort to be happy that is making us miserable. And that there is an… (tovább)

Tartalomjegyzék

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Canongate, Edinburgh, 2013
256 oldal · puhatáblás · ISBN: 9781847678669
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Faber and Faber, London, 2013
256 oldal · puhatáblás · ISBN: 9780865478015
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Canongate, London, 2012
236 oldal · keménytáblás · ISBN: 9781847678645

Enciklopédia 1


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Kiemelt értékelések

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Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote

Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

A boldogság nem abban rejlik, ha elkerüljük a negatívnak ítélt helyzeteket, vagy „kitöröljük a szótárunkból a lehetetlen szót”, ahogy Amerika egyik legismertebb motivációs trénere ajánlotta (aki később sajnos csődbe jutott). Minél inkább kerülni igyekszünk mindent, ami számunkra kellemetlen, annál kevésbé leszünk boldogok, és annál távolabb kerülünk attól, amit „igazi életnek” nevezhetünk. A szerző alaposan körbejárja a témát, megfordul többek között vipassana meditáción, Eckhart Tollénél, Brené Brown-nál, sztoikus filozófusoknál, Mexikói halottak ünnepén, és megpróbálja leszűrni, ami közös gondolatot talál bennük. Nagyon érdekes könyv, remélem előbb-utóbb lefordítódik és kiadódik nálunk is.


Népszerű idézetek

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The arrival of George Bush on stage in San Antonio was heralded by the sudden appearance of his Secret Service detail. These were men who would probably have stood out anywhere, in their dark suits and earpieces, but who stood out twice as prominently at Get Motivated! thanks to their rigid frowns. The job of protecting former presidents from potential assassins, it appeared, wasn't one that rewarded looking on the bright side and assuming that nothing could go wrong.

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Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

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'Causally minded' people, to use Sarasvathy's terminology, are those who select or are given a specific goal, and then choose from whatever means are available to make a plan for achieving it. Effectually minded people, on the other hand, examine what means and materials are at their disposal, then imagine what possible ends, or provisional next directions, those means might make possible. The effectualists include the cook who scours the fridge for leftover ingredients; the chemist who figured out that the insufficiently sticky glue he had developed could be used to create the Post-it note; or the unhappy lawyer who realises that her spare-time photography hobby, for which she already possesses the skills and the eqipment, could be turned into a job.

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Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

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Start with your means. Don't wait for the perfect opportunity. Start taking action, based on what you have readily available: what you are, what you know and who you know. Don't be guided by thoughts of how wonderful the rewards might be is you were spectacularly successful at any given next step. Instead – and there are distinct echoes, here, of the Stoic focus on the worst-case scenario – ask how big the loss would be if you failed. So long as it would be tolerable, that's all you need to know. Take the next step, and see what happens.

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Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

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This, then, is the deep truth about insecurity: it is another word for life. That doesn't mean it's not wise to protect yourself, as far as you can, from certain specific dangers. But it does mean that feeling secure and really living life are, in some ultimate sense, opposites. And that you can no more succeed in achieving perfect security than a wave could succeed in leaving the ocean.

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Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

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'Look', said Frankie Otieno, drinking Coke in his mother's sofa, when I asked him about all this, 'Kibera is not a good place. Big problems, and a million NGOs who don't do any good. Major, major problems. But you have to manage, because you have to. So you take what you have and you get on with it. And you can be happy like that, because happiness comes from your family, and other people, and in making something better of yourself, and in new horizons… right? Why worry about something you don't have?'

Oliver Burkeman: The Antidote Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking


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Demi Lovato: Staying Strong
Vadim Zeland: Reality transurfing
Nick Trenton: Calm Your Thoughts
Dalai Lama XIV – Desmond Tutu – Douglas Carlton Abrams: The Book of Joy
Mihály Csíkszentmihályi: Finding Flow
Kristin Neff: Self-Compassion
The Dalai Lama: Eight Verses for Training the Mind
Marie Kondo: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up
Cal Newport: Digital Minimalism
Ichiro Kishimi – Fumitake Koga: The Courage to be Disliked